"You chose to change. He chose to die."

[raven]

I am writing fic.

I have to say it quietly, because I'm so frightened of jinxing it. I haven't written fic since November 2006, for various reasons but mostly because my head was too messed up for it. And then a couple of days ago I wrote, and I kept writing, and it was great. I took my laptop to the Social Science Library because I thought I wouldn't be distracted from, er, Sinhalese majoritarianism in Sri Lanka, but I sat there with my books in the absolute quiet of the reading room, pulled up the right window and wrote fic. I'm very happy, but quietly.

In fact, let's not talk about that any more.

In other news, tonight was the last Cerberus event of term. I think that in my time as reigning Triarch, this was definitely our best show. Fifteen people turned up to have dinner with Peter Singer, and about fifty to hear him speak, and I actually really enjoyed it. He spoke on the sanctity of human life, arguments against, and at least people got emotive about it. I was annoyed at two people's behaviour - one PPEist whom I don't like generally, because if you don't agree with him, you're wrong, and while we're all painfully used to his total lack of regard for anyone else's opinion, you don't attack a guest speaker, get childishly pissed off when he tactfully moves on and turn your chair around and have a sulk, and also one of my tutors from last term, whom Wolfgang (another Triarch) had to quietly shush to allow other people to talk.

(Honestly, why can't these people behave? It's only a matter of sitting in a chair quietly and listening, and knowing how long is too long when you talk. Such egotism.)

Before dinner, Sam (yet another Triarch) introduced me to a friend of his living in Oxford. I smiled and said hello as you do, and it wasn't until much later, when I heard his last name, that I realised I'd just met pinkishmew's brother. And made tiny noises of squee, because eee, tiny tiny world. (The difficult part was Sam saying, "Oh, wow, you know Neill's sister! How?" and me going, "Er... the internets..."

Anyway, where was I? Busily recounting tales of Cerberus, because, alas, I haven't been around much lately. This is my proverbial Week O'Crazy, because on top of the usual - Cerberus, two essays, associated tutes, OULES - my parents appeared for a couple of days, and I've got to go to London for AIESEC this weekend, and I signed up to spend most of the weekend at the language centre to hone my non-existent ability for language, and I'm also doing Tiptop's art design from scratch, because I am crazy. Anyway, that's why I've not been around and have been being a bad friend, in general. Too much to dooooo. Favourite among these things to do has been being picked up, hit, punched, generally knocked around and dropped on Wadham gardens, courtesy of OULES rehearsals and my very bad habit of volunteering for things. (There are pictures on Facebook entirely without context, it's marvellous.)

Er, that's it. I babble because I am kind of failing a little bit - this is me six hours before a tute for which I have not written a word, and am not planning to - but, really, I'm coping. Sure, it would be nice to cope and get everything done, but I think my own sanity is quite precious to me. And also, I adore being Triarch, and I love languages, and it makes Pat so happy that I do her art design, and it was great to see my parents. (AIESEC will be deserving of love the moment they learn to use punctuation in a manner consistent with the rest of the human race.) And I utterly [[heart]] OULES; it's so much fun, being surrounded by people who are vastly more talented than you but are perfectly happy to let you play. And drop you on your head.

Um. Also. I have watched Human Nature and Family of Blood far too many times for someone who supposedly has a lot of work to do. John Smith! Oh, John Smith oh woe.

Oh, also, again! Fic recs.

Impossible Things, by casirafics.
The Doctor and Martha, the Doctor and Reinette, the Doctor and John Smith; the Doctor who's been lonely so long he can't remember anything else. Beautiful writing, beautiful flow, and, oh, Doctor. [Spoilers through FoB]

The first of Five Variations On An Inspiration, by troyswann.
Sal's stories are always wonderful, but this one struck a chord; this is Daniel Jackson in the desert on Abydos, being so very painfully himself, and her prose is, as usual, perfect.

Comments

[casirafics.livejournal.com]

I keep rewatching the scene in the Cartwrights' house. Will not be telling you how many times now....

*clings to John*

[casirafics.livejournal.com]

Also, goodness, meant to say -- fic! I'm looking forward to that (she says quietly, so as not to jinx). :)

[footnotetoplato.livejournal.com]

That was the first Cerberus event I've been to (because ... Peter Singer). I rather enjoyed it (minus some bickering/questions missing the point), so was wondering how they normally compare?

[Also, not sure if I should be apologising for reading your journal. I've never really understood etiquette on friending. Sorry.]

[chiasmata]

Eeeee!

Fancy a coffee when you're less swamped? How is it nearly the end of term, again?? :)

[pinkishmew.livejournal.com]

Eee, my brother is awesome. :)

[tiny cuddles for that thing we're not mentioning]

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

*cries* I haven't got the episode downloaded, so I'm having to watch on YouTube, and oh, oh, John. I love how it's none of the Doctor's single-emo-tear malarkey - it's all messy and ugly and painful and he doesn't want to die... waaah.

Fic! I woke up this morning and it was still there!

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked it! Normally they are much smaller - Singer was quite the draw.

Oh, no need to apologise, although I must admit that I hadn't noticed you were reading! You're perfectly welcome. :)

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Eeeee. I am doing no actual essay but never mind, fic!

Love to! When are you free? I'm not free until about Tuesday now, but I'm not going back up north without seeing you! Are you going to come to any of the OULES shows?

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

He really is!

*crosses every part of body*

[walkertxkitty.livejournal.com]

Always good to hear from you. I wonder what you're doing often but I don't have much time on the 'net myself since we're getting ready to put the horses in.

I'm glad you found your muse. I know what it's like to have one go wandering off, seemingly never to return. I'm always afraid mine will do that again but my luck has held so far.

[tau_sigma]

The difficult part was Sam saying, "Oh, wow, you know Neill's sister! How?" and me going, "Er... the internets..."

Oh, I know! Most of my RL friends completely fail to understand the possibility of making friends via the internets. It's like an unknown country; very odd.

You are crazy, and it sounds like your week has been crazy busy. But you are categorically not a bad friend, because, you know, you phoned me, and it was lovely to talk to you, and very cheering. :) *loves*

[mettanna.livejournal.com]

Pardon the odd question, but do you, by any chance, know someone called Clare Turbervill? I can't quite tell from the Facebook photos, and she isn't tagged - but there is a girl who looks a lot like the Clare i met during interview at LMH, all those years ago!

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

*grins* Good to hear from you, too. I am well, just busy.

And, hey, thank you. I'm feeling really good about that just now.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Clare is, I think, one of the OULES I don't know her, but there must certainly exist pictures of both me and her. If you were not several thousand miles way, I'd say come and see the show!

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

I know! For me it's totally normal, and I forget that it isn't for other people.

Yep, I am crazy. But hopefully in the good way. And it was great to talk to you! We should do that more often.

[mettanna.livejournal.com]

Ahh, the small world - gets me every time! Would much love to come and see said show, but yeah, with the several thousand miles thing... Hope all is well on your end nonetheless :)