And I swear that I don't have a gun...

Yuk. Have spent entire morning so far playing with layout. Not that I've really made anything that great out of it, but it's different.
And apart from that, nothing. The painters are here, making nuisances of themselves as per usual. And I think I'm bored.
I would like to go out, but it's too hot and depressing. The road is totally empty. I might even go to the library and get some books, but I don't know if I can be bothered to go so far. I'd probably melt on the way.
And I'm tired too. And that's not fair, because today is the first day in six weeks in which I've been able to sleep as long as I want. Too much of not enough, and now one day of too much just being too much. Sleep, that is.
And no-one's online either, out of fifty-eight contacts.
I ought to write something now I have the time but I don't feel like doing that either.
This is just not fair.
I might watch Frozen later. At least, I would have done if it was cold and wet and windy. But it's not. It's what is usally referred to as a "beautiful day" and I hate those. They always make me feel everyone is outside having a much better day than me.
This entry hasn't actually said anything so far.
I sound like the people I hate. And I haven't said anything so far today, but no doubt my voice still sounds like Darth Vader.

Some quiz

name 10 bands you listen to:
Jack off Jill
Silverchair
Alanis Morrisette (thought she's not a band)
U2
Staind
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Nirvana
Train (though it's been a while)
Texas
Dido (though she's not a band either)

name 9 things you hate:
Big Brother
white chocolate
Katrina
tomatoes
toothpaste (brushing my teeth nearly makes me sick every morning)
HTML that doesn't work
pointless dirty-mindedness
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
that thing with the thing. Yeah, boredom.

name 8 things you love or couldn't do without:
internet connection
fanfic
slash!
reading
writing
sci-fi
cinnamon
music

name 7 people you could stand in your life or being friends with forever:
Becca
Emily (Kutarski)
Loz
Mani
My dad!
Helena
Beverley

name 6 movies you love:
While you were sleeping
Star Wars: Attack of the Clones
Lagaan
Shrek
Airplane!
the Sixth Sense

name the last 5 places you've visited:
here! ie home
school
McDonalds'
town
um... cinema

name last 4 things you've bought or spent money on:
train tickets
chocolate
sandwich
earrings

name last 3 thoughts:
Rainy days are better than sunny days
Heliopolis is still AWOL
ER is worth watching

last 2 things you've ate: - eaten! not ate! eaten!
giant-size chocolate finger
um.... some rice. last night. i think.

last person you've talked to on msn:
Enid

person who rules the most:
Emily. I think. Or maybe Gez, for her dress sense alone.

Shades of grey

I'm watching Star Trek: TNG again, but a new ep, one I haven't seen before.

I was thinking about the church service. It was boring, yes, it was mind-numbingly boring, yes, but it was thought-provoking. Bev decided she didn't want to be part of any religion, but rather make up her own religion, Bevjomelism. Whatever that entails.
But seriously, I'm against Christianity for a variety of reasons. To start with, it preaches that every human being is born already fallen, because Eve ate the apple in the Garden of Eden. I find this is a difficult concept. That's saying, humans are incapable of doing good things, being good people, in the eyes of God, because of something that happened at the dawn of time? Apparently, only God can save people from the fires of hell. And there's something else right there. According to literal Christianity, good people go to heaven and bad people go to hell. But everyone who's ever tried to write or seen a good film or talked to a human being knows there's no such thing as good people and bad people, just many many shades of grey.
And then the whole doctrine - which states that you must be a good person, help the needy, not steal, nor lie, nor do anything wicked, in order to be redeemed. Note that. In order to be redeemed. Don't help the needy cause then they won't be needy any more, don't not lie cause it hurts people, don't not steal cause that also hurts people, don't do all those things because only then you will be redeemed. It's doing good things for a very selfish reason.
Then there's the issue of conversion. I'm aware that Hinduism is the only religion that states you should not attempt to convert people, but accept their beliefs. But even so, I do not like Christian views. I am not going to hell because I am a Hindu. I am not a "heathen" or a "savage." I am a human being just like them, and I too have the ability to be a good person.
So that's why I don't like it. That's why.

No .... ya think?

Raven's lost her hawk says:
hello!
Kim says:
Hi!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
I'm doing a beta for you, aren't I?
Kim says:
Yep!! Hope you like mystory, by the way.
Raven's lost her hawk says:
oh, I do, I do. I haven't finished the beta yet, though, cause what do you know, MS word has crashed on me. Seven times. in one night.
Kim says:
Computers!! Like to be awkward when you least want them to be! Glad you like it so far. I'm going to Spain 2mora, and I won't be checking my e-mail for a week, so don't think I'm ignoring if I don't reply, ok?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
'kay. lucky you, Spain! by the way, where are you planning to archive your fic? you do know about the Heliopolis situation, right?
Kim says:
Thanks! I know, and I'm not sure yet. Any suggestions?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
um... ff.net. which is crappy, and then there's statistical outliers - damn, only s/d stuff, and then the alphagate - but I can't figure out how to submit fic to it.
God, I'm a lot of help.
Kim says:
Hey! At least you can come up with suggestions, which is better than me!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
have you been writing long?
Kim says:
Yes and no. Writing in general, yes. Writing fanfic, no. In fact on the fanfic side of things, this is my first attempt, so I'm just kinda hoping for a good response!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
the very first one? wow!
Kim says:
Yep, its my first! Luckily I'm pretty good at creative writing anyway, so that helped a lot. How long have you been writing?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
writing in general since I could talk - I think. writing Stargate fanfic - a while. at the moment I have 42 archived fics... I think(!)
Kim says:
Wow!! That's a helluva lot of archives!! I'd love to read something of yours, if you don't mind waiting a while.
Raven's lost her hawk says:
please go ahead! and on that topic - I'm in current need of a beta... *hint hint* my usual ones have fled the country (are they trying to tell me something?)
Kim says:
I'd be glad to beta something for you! Maybe they're trying to tell you that your works so good they feel they are unworthy of reading it!! Or not! It'll have to wait until I get back from Spain next week, is that ok?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
yeah, that's fine. thanks!
Kim says:
It's ok!! On the subject of betas, would you beta some more of my stuff for me?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
yeah, of course!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
good.
Raven's lost her hawk says:
so, how old are you? (I need to keep that in mind when I inflict my horrible fic on you)
Kim says:
I'm 15, but a very mature 15.
Raven's lost her hawk says:
so am I, honey!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
I need to be two years older before I can read my own fic.
Kim says:
It can be that bad!! Besides, who says that age should come into it, it should be about the writing!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
well - my previous beta - Aloysius - called me a force of darkness.
Kim says:
So!! If you read any of my none fanfic writing, you'd probably think I was completely crazy!! And probably a psycopath too!! (I'm not by the way!)
Kim says:
THE ROAD LESS TRAVELLED

CRUEL TWIST OF FATE

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.
The Road Not Taken- Robert Frost

She sat alone, watching him silen
Raven's lost her hawk says:
great. please be warned, my betas do tend to go nuts after a while. you may have read some of their stuff - Aloysius, Cam, Hathor and Zia nova - and they're all as nutty as fruit cake now(!)
Kim says:
I've read some of their stuff, Zia nova's very good at writing humour. You don't need to worry about me going crazy, most of my friends would say I already am! And you've never met my friend Anna, no matter how sane you are, she'll definately drive you crazy!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
hey, my best friend is talking to me in the other window - she wants me to come with her to an art gallery, I asked why:

And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
to say 'today, i went to the art gallery with iona, she fell over and killed a pigeon'

Kim says:
Nice!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
iona is me. it's one of my many nicknames. and becca has a phobia of pigeons.
Kim says:
Weird!! Well, probably not that weird, I have a phobia of injections! (Shivers!) I HATE them! Tell becca I said hi!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
hello,
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
kim
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
.

Raven's lost her hawk says:
she is a little mad. admittedly, but she's my best friend, what does that say about me?
Kim says:
It says that your a little like me, we both have mad best friends. Maybe that makes us both mad too?!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
no, we can be the sane best friends. can't we? *gibbers Legacy-style*
Kim says:
Yeah!! Well, you can, I think it's already too late for me. But I'm crazy and I'm happy, so who cares?!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*sings* don't worry, be happy...
Kim says:
Exactly!! Anyway me and my friends all work on the basis that life's too short to care what other people think! If they're that bothered about you, they've obviously got no life of their own. Right?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
right! I knew I'd like you...
Kim says:
Thanks!! I knew I'd like you too. I think you'd probably like Anna too, once you get used to the insanity that is!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
oh, I love insanity!
Kim says:
Me too!! How boring would life be if we were all sane and normal?

And i'd give up forever to touch you has been added to the conversation.

Kim says:
Hi becca!!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
hia
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
how r u?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*laughs*
Raven's lost her hawk says:
Becca!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
what?
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
mother
Kim says:
Fine thanks. Must be nice having Iona as a best friend
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
oh fantastic, i never look stupid
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*laughs* are you still going to make me go to the art gallery and kill pigeons?!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
yes, but be not too violent with the pigeains, we might have dinner
Kim says:
You really don't like pigeons, huh? Not that I blame you, I don't like them either. Did iona tell you about my injection phobia?
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
really?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
I didn't. and we don't want to start on my list of phobias.
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
i could cope with that, coz needles dont ly over u in town and trafalgar square
Kim says:
Yep!! Hate them, every time I have to have one I end up nearly crying. I had to have my TB this year and it was horrible, I was literally on the verge of tears when I had it done!!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
aaaaaaw, atleast it's only every now and then, what if u were diabetic?!
Kim says:
One word-HELP!!!!!!!!!!!! I'd probably die from fear or something!! I'm guessing that you live in London?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
she lives in London!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
no, fantastically boring crosby.......
Kim says:
Where's crosby?
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
liverpool
Raven's lost her hawk says:
and so is Formby, where I live.
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
hehe
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
never heard of formby........
Kim says:
Liverpool! Not that bad, at least you have decent shops! I live in incredibly boring Harrogate, the land of crap shopping!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
Becca, do we have decent shops?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
I very much doubt it...
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
oh yeah, there's the newsagents, or the old lady clothes shop....
Kim says:
Bet you do! Gotta be better than here, I live in a town where most of the people are 70!!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
70 is such a cool age!
Kim says:
Not if you're 15 and want to go out with your friends!! There's nothing to do around here, unless you want to spend your time skating (yuk!)!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
ice or roller?
Kim says:
Skateboards!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
i would be dead 6 times over if i tried something like that
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*pictures it*
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*laughs*
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
u are picturing my six deaths and laughing?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
no!!!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
would I do that? who would I got shopping with?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*go
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
haha!
Kim says:
Me too! i've never tried, and don't want to i'd end up looking like an idiot! I have friends who skateboard though, they're umm....*searches for a word*
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
greasy?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
ahem.
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*rattles chains menacingly*
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
yeah, are they ahem?
Kim says:
Probably better to say, typical 15 year old boys! Know what I mean?
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
oooh, do now, so they are greasy then?!
Kim says:
Yeah! And spotty, and they have the mental age of four year olds *rolls her eyes*
Raven's lost her hawk says:
sounds like people I know!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
yeah, boys
Kim says:
Is it me or do all the boys you know act annoyingly alike? Can't they think for themselves?
Raven's lost her hawk says:
no, they can't. but neither can some girls - they all wear the same things!
Kim says:
Oh, yeah!! The really popular people, who are like sheep, you mean?!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
yes! we have one!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
baaaaaaaa, what?
Kim says:
Oh god!! What are we going to do? We've got to save becca, she's turned into a sheep!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
*laughs hysterically" she has one - called Bernie!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
u will never take my fur!!!!!!!
Raven's lost her hawk says:
wool!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
no, thats a cow
Raven's lost her hawk says:
Bernie is a cow?
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
oh yeah, wool
Raven's lost her hawk says:
I thought he was a sheep!
And i'd give up forever to touch you says:
yes,
Raven's lost her hawk says:
computer's crashing!

You are having temporary network problems and are no longer in this conversation.

Fucking msn. I was enjoying that.