actually you're the sanest person I've ever known

[raven]

So I am worried about my mental health, both in the comedic, hey, I seem to be making a lot of off-the-wall life decisions recently and also in the almost as comedic, hey, I think my life may be happening to someone else. This does not feel like my periodic instances of sensible mental ill-health that are cured with rest and time and self-awareness. Those are well-smoothed pebbles. This feels like the river itself, turning over rocks. I am told that the current heatwave is rather like the one we had in the summer of 2003, during which I was sixteen and in flux, writing fic incessantly, seized with an inarticulable ungluing under my skin. There is nothing new under the sun.

Speaking of the sun, it's very warm. Work is.... quite dull, at the moment; I have no files of my own, for reasons that are kind of depressing to go into, so I'm pottering along doing not much of anything. Wedding planning marches on and is far outpacing me. (Everyone's got an opinion! But I don't. I don't really have any opinions about anything.) I am supposed to be doing a thousand things, both right now and in the general case, and instead I am sitting here gently overheating and idly plotting what a Vorkosigan/M*A*S*H fusion AU would look like.

(Why I am doing this, I don't know. But remember the bit right at the beginning with the eleven (seventeen? some number, anyway) uterine replicators the Barrayarans have been given to deal with at the prison camp? Imagine the military field hospital attached to the camp - dedicated, but anarchic, and by this point in the war, very cranky - who are suddenly tasked with the responsibility. Yeah.)

The sun is shining; I am going to Edinburgh tomorrow; I am, at least, still writing; still here, still here, still here.

Comments

[hedda62]

idly plotting what a Vorkosigan/M*A*S*H fusion AU would look like

OMG. Yes. I never thought of it till this moment, but dammit, it would work. Hawkeye's commentary on the situation would be priceless. And Margaret's, heh.

I hope you are feeling better soon, and yes, things do go round in cycles. Hope it cools off, too. (I mean, it's much hotter here, but we're sort of used to it and have air conditioning everywhere.)

[raven]

I'm writing it! Maybe three people are going to read it but I CARE NOT. *sigh* This is as good a time as any to tell you I read, enjoyed, and partly failed to understand, your lovely Martin fic of the other day. Martin is always adorable and you write him beautifully.

And thanks for your kind words - I am in Scotland, where it is cooler, and feeling a little better. :)

[hedda62]

Oh, I'm so glad you're writing it. I'm always amazed at how many people read crossovers, so you never know what audience you'll reach.

And thank you - I'm so glad to have met Martin. And Frank is not a bad perspective on Lost, being somewhat an outsider, but it would still be fairly incomprehensible, yes. :)

[silverhare]

Much love. *offers hugs and tea*

[raven]

Thank you, dear. :)

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm very sorry; difficult mental health is horrible. I hope this is just a blip (after all, you've got a lot on your plate at the moment with two weddings and jobhunting and so on; you're entitled to be wobbly), and that you reach a more stable position.

Enjoy Edinburgh, and good luck with the planning. xx

[highfantastical.livejournal.com]

I second V. in hoping it might be more of a blip -- mental health woe sucks so much, and you're objectively under loads of stress, so it's not surprising things are rough. I really hope Edinburgh is good to you. *hugs* <3

[bibliotropic.livejournal.com]

*hugs*
Mental health things. You've got a lot of stresses at the moment, it seems, which might be dislodging your sensible, smooth pebbles.
Have an excellent time in Edinburgh! And, I would absolutely love that fic, were you to write it. I'm relatively un-busy until the end of August and would be happy to beta, when the time comes.
xo

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Thank you, my dear. :) That fic - well, I kind of really do want to write it! You're very sweet to offer to beta but I suspect I may just end up writing a very few hundred words. I'm opening up a doc now and seeing what happens. :P

[hannahrorlove.livejournal.com]

Best of luck getting your feet back under you, as mental health goes.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Thank you, you're very kind.

[troyswann.livejournal.com]

Aw,I was I'm edinburgh on thursday--we may have passed on the street!

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

We may indeed! I am excited about Thursday!