wedding planning notes

[raven]

Not sure I ought to have to say this, but here it is anyway: I am allowed to make fun of Indian weddings. You - white, don't-they-last-four-days-and-they're-all-colourful-tee-hee, thoughtless you - are not. Getting married in a grey church in England is not a "normal" way to get married. Thanks, glad we've cleared that up.

Anyway, so. Wedding planning has taken its great leap forwards. The Scottish shindig now has a guest list, a photographer, (probably) a cake, (probably) a ceilidh band, two readers, two witnesses, a venue, a menu and even favours, ye gods. I need to get my dress altered and am cleverly combining this with vidukon_cardiff (don't even ask). We still need a playlist, a script, a last-minute narrative resolution to a continuing spat re: canapés, and sixty-five tiny screwtop jars.

The Indian wedding has dates, venues, three documents in progress (schedule; historical and religious contexts, with footnotes; visa procedures, a beginner's guide) a vague guest list, invitation wording if not actual invitations (I drafted this yesterday while putting up with heckling from all sides), a cast of thousands, and a certain sense that Things Are Getting Done. Not by me, I hasten to add. But done.

My to-do list is still in three parts and synced between three devices. But... hurrah? I think?

(I think I shall pre-emptively declare 2014 the Year of the Hammock, With No To-Do Lists At All.)

(I hope to begin it in a houseboat in Srinagar.)

Comments

[silverhare]

<3

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

You - white, don't-they-last-four-days-and-they're-all-colourful-tee-hee, thoughtless you - are not. Getting married in a grey church in England is not a "normal" way to get married.

Oh. Ugh. (At them, not you.)

Good luck with all of the planning! It sounds exhausting, but like you're well on the way. What sort of dates are you looking at?

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

The Scottish wedding is in September and the Delhi one in the last week of the year. It is rather exhausting, yes!

[stained_glass]

Bah, so sorry you have to have to have the first paragraph! *HUGS!* I am so excited though - the Scottish Shindig is neatly printed in my diary. :D CEILIDH BAND. <333

(Also, are you coming to the Banquet? Please say you are!)

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

CEILIDH BAND! THERE WILL BE DAAAANCIN'.

(yes yes yes! A and I will be there with bells on.)

[stained_glass]

Yaaaay yaaaaay! TO BOTH!

(ALSO: what kind of dress code are you going for for the Scottish Shindig?)

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Dress code is formal-ish, but no gender-prescription obv and really I don't mind. What did you have in mind? :)

[stained_glass]

Oh, I was just thinking excitedly and wondering whether a new dress I got might suit! :D *BOUNCES* I'm so excited for the Banquet as well - do you want any particular colour for the shutter shades?

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

You are just the best. I leave my shutter shades to your discretion. :P

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

... are you going as Party Dad Thranduil?

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

I am told the answer to this is yes. I'm doing what I'm told. :P

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

Hee. I look forward to seeing you in costume!

[highfantastical.livejournal.com]

EXCITED FOR WEDDINGS

<3

eta: obviously a massive DNW to anyone making fun. *hugs*

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

ME TOO. also scared. BUT EXCITED!

[highfantastical.livejournal.com]

My parents are still loath to let me travel to places on my own but I am working on them since I REALLY WANT TO COME! At the moment I think they're much more anxious about Edinburgh than India because although it's nearer my last trip there wasn't wholly successful (understatement of the century). But this is entirely different because wedding. (And I love the city, obvs.)

It may sound slightly ludicrous that they are involved at all in these decisions, given I am nearly 26, but I need them to help me pay for tickets - and it's so wearing living with their anxiety about me going to places alone that it will all be much better if I can secure their wholehearted endorsement. Which I think I will. Planning to discuss it very firmly in early March when all three of us will be sunk in deep despair and thus they're likely to get on board with anything future-oriented.

TL;DR - excited and making plans. ;)

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

My dear, my parents are planning my wedding to the point of telling me what to say, what to do, when to turn up and whom to invite. I'll be 27. It is an accident of circumstance. :)

(Btw, I mentioned to my mother last night that you were planning on coming - if it'd be at all helpful for your parents to speak to her (either as-my-mum or as-medical-professional-who-will-be-there) she'd be very happy to help.)

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

I frequently get told by my parents that I am not dressed warmly enough, or to be careful of hot things. Oh, parents. (Working with my mum is slightly tricky, as she tends to come over and tell me my hair/clothes are not smart enough, and then attempts to fix them. I have pointed out that she doesn't do this to the other receptionists.) Best of luck with getting through the wedding planning process without them driving you mad!

[khalinche.livejournal.com]

My mum still holds my hand when she's visiting me in the city and we cross the road.

[leiascully.livejournal.com]

How could anyone think that a grey church wedding was anywhere near as interesting? I'm sorry that people are being dumb around you. I'm sure both of your weddings will be joyful and amazing and gloriously full of love.

Jealous of your houseboat. I saw a picture once and the amount I want to go and see one for real is rather staggering. Maybe one day.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

You are very kind. :) And honestly, I'm sure it might be as interesting! But urgh, you would not believe people. Some people ask a lot of questions because they're kind and interested, and others are just like "...really. Gosh really. How terribly exotic of you."

(It's a very old daydream of mine, the Dal Lake in the winter! I'm shamefully more excited about it than the actual wedding.)

[leiascully.livejournal.com]

I have to refrain from shouting every time someone uses the word exotic. And while it's true that I've never been to an English wedding, I've been to a bunch of grey American church weddings, and I found the Indian wedding I've been to much more celebratory and much less ostentatious. Sometimes church weddings are so boring and preachy and people are creepy about the wedding night.

(Why shouldn't you be? It sounds glorious! And much less stressful than weddings.)

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

Houseboat in Srinagar is surely the BEST IMAGINABLE WAY TO START ANY YEAR EVER.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

inorite! I am soooo excited about that! I've had daydreams about that for years.

[soupytwist.livejournal.com]

I think a hammock (and absolutely no people who are rude, racist, and apparently think "colourful" is a hilarious diss) sounds EXCELLENT and well earned. I am sending so many good wishes.

(Also, I may have been explaining your awesomeness at great length at a party yesterday. It was relevant!)

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

ohhh, you! <333 thank you, lovely.

[gamesiplay.livejournal.com]

Oh, I am so happy for you.

I just thought that bore saying. <3

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

Thank you, lovely you. <333

[bekkypk.livejournal.com]

I actually don't see the point of weddings at all :D But if they have to be done It doesn't bother me how, though obviously if I was going to, colours and fun would be a theme :D
Urg of people *making fun* though! WTF.
xx

[marymac.livejournal.com]

Two weddings and a houseboat Srinagar (photos, all the photos, I beg you) sounds about as perfect as possible. As does other people organising the life out of it!

If you're still looking for jam jars, my mum got 50 200ml ones online for about a tenner at Christmas. From this experience, I would advise trying to put anything hot or liquid in them, unless you have someone who fills test tubes for their day-job handy.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

All the photos, yes! <3 Lots of them. I am looking at around £50 for my jars right now, but I think 200ml may be a little big for my purposes. Where did your mum get hers, if you don't mind my asking?

[marymac.livejournal.com]

Apparently they were 2oz, not 200ml, I'm a div and you'll probably want the size down, says mother and produced a link to really tiny jars. (http://www.jbconline.co.uk/shop/0-200ml-glass-jars/1oz-mini-jam-jar-with-caps/)

I come by my random information retention honestly, apparently.

[bibliotropic.livejournal.com]

<3 <3 <3
I don't have much nice to say about white people and wedding preparations; this has tripped up several attempts at commenting. In many ways, I feel like weddings bring so many assumptions and prejudices that people may or may not otherwise voice under other circumstances to the surface. I was horrified by some of the things my family members said when we were planning our wedding and what that revealed about their beliefs and assumptions. I'm so sorry people are saying thoughtless, racist things to you.
The Year of the Hammock sounds like a wonderful plan.

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

you are so kind, lovely. Thank you for your kindness. <3