Subject.

[raven]

"Michael Moore condemns George W. Bush as a fictitious president. Bush disputes this, as he's never even been to Fictitia."


That joke amused me. Apart from it, my weekend has been characterised by constant tiredness. I feel like crap, and I don't know why. I don't feel like doing anything. I've tried updating a few times and just given up; got up and left the computer with the Update Journal page still up on the screen.

I don't want to revise, but that's not the problem. Usually I don't want to revise because there are so many better things to do, but now, there ain't, there's nothing to do. I've abandoned most of my online stuff and I don't know why I've done it. I'm still here, of course, no-one ever gets me off LJ, but I've not been on the mailing lists or the Dope and I've not been replying to email at all; I've just sat here and watched the screen.

RL has been hectic, and while the awards night and the not-Divali gathering were good, since then I just feel blank. Today is a quiet tidy-up day, and I ought to revise, lurk online, read, go down to the beach, do something I usually do, not just sit on the windowsill and stare outside blankly.

I can't write, either. By my reckoning it's been more than fortnight since I actually wrote a single word. I haven't gone that long without writing for literally years, but I can't force myself to write when there's nothing there. It's like feeling so drained and empty, like I do after I've finished a really good fic, or done an exam paper, or revised solidly for an hour, or constructed a carefully written argument on the Dope, it's like I've done all those things, that kind of emotional drained blankness, but only I haven't done any of that stuff, so there's no accompanying sense of achievement, it's just -

Comments

Re:

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

I'm glad!