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ravenApparently, some strange people with time on their hands have been researching what is the world's funniest joke. The answer they came up with:
Two gamekeepers are walking through the woods. Suddenly, a bear jumps out from nowhere and mauls one of them, drags him around by the hair, bangs his head about and then leaves him for dead, while his friend watches in horror. Once the bear goes, he runs down to his friend's side, whips out his mobile, and dials for help. The emergency services woman is very helpful. "First of all," she says, "make sure he's dead."
There's a sound of a gunshot, and then the guy comes back on the line. "Okay, now what?"
Is it just me, or is that joke not funny? I did laugh out loud at the runner-up, however, which goes as follows:
A dog goes to the post office and asks to send a telegram. He takes a sheet, and carefully writes, "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof."
The woman who takes it from him notices there are only nine words. "You could send another "woof" for the same price," she says.
"Oh, I couldn't do that," says the dog. "That would make absolutely no sense at all."
I laughed at that. But then I carried on reading the article (it was in Time) which reaches the unavoidable conclusion that this is not the funniest joke in the world, it is the funniest clean joke in the world. The guy running the project had this to say for himself: "Well, I wouldn't have minded, but we were going to put the results on the university website, so..."
And that's that. However, in my humble opinion, the funniest joke in the world is one of the jokes that used to come at the end of the Vicar of Dibley. And here... *drum roll*... it is:
Superman is flying over New York one day when whaddaya know, he sees Wonderwoman sunbathing naked on a flat roof. So, being in that kind of a mood, he flies down, does the business, and then flies off again.
Once he's gone, Wonderwoman says, "What the hell was that?"
The Invisible Man climbs off her, and says thoughtfully, "I don't know, but it fucking well hurt!"
So sue me, I am easily amused. I loved this joke. Actually, I loved all the Vicar of Dibley jokes. What Alice says after this one is even funnier than the joke itself, but I'll ruin it if I don't quote verbatim, so I'm not even going to try.
Two gamekeepers are walking through the woods. Suddenly, a bear jumps out from nowhere and mauls one of them, drags him around by the hair, bangs his head about and then leaves him for dead, while his friend watches in horror. Once the bear goes, he runs down to his friend's side, whips out his mobile, and dials for help. The emergency services woman is very helpful. "First of all," she says, "make sure he's dead."
There's a sound of a gunshot, and then the guy comes back on the line. "Okay, now what?"
Is it just me, or is that joke not funny? I did laugh out loud at the runner-up, however, which goes as follows:
A dog goes to the post office and asks to send a telegram. He takes a sheet, and carefully writes, "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof."
The woman who takes it from him notices there are only nine words. "You could send another "woof" for the same price," she says.
"Oh, I couldn't do that," says the dog. "That would make absolutely no sense at all."
I laughed at that. But then I carried on reading the article (it was in Time) which reaches the unavoidable conclusion that this is not the funniest joke in the world, it is the funniest clean joke in the world. The guy running the project had this to say for himself: "Well, I wouldn't have minded, but we were going to put the results on the university website, so..."
And that's that. However, in my humble opinion, the funniest joke in the world is one of the jokes that used to come at the end of the Vicar of Dibley. And here... *drum roll*... it is:
Superman is flying over New York one day when whaddaya know, he sees Wonderwoman sunbathing naked on a flat roof. So, being in that kind of a mood, he flies down, does the business, and then flies off again.
Once he's gone, Wonderwoman says, "What the hell was that?"
The Invisible Man climbs off her, and says thoughtfully, "I don't know, but it fucking well hurt!"
So sue me, I am easily amused. I loved this joke. Actually, I loved all the Vicar of Dibley jokes. What Alice says after this one is even funnier than the joke itself, but I'll ruin it if I don't quote verbatim, so I'm not even going to try.
