as it broadcasts the words, "Actual reality!"

The GDL farewell reception was last night. I note this as a dispassionate fact apropos of nothing. What did totally not happen, at all, in any way whatsoever, is that I did not wander over at six o'clock, drink two glasses of wine in desperation at the company and then resolve to run away very fast, only for Lia to appear and immediately have the bright idea of sitting in a corner with two bottles and two plates of smoked salmon canapés, and then we all did not go down the hill, sit in a moody murky bar in Jericho and drink smushy cocktails with raspberries in and talk about sex, in that kind of dim smoky quasy-sitcomic way you do talk about sex in cocktail bars at one in the morning, and after that we didn't go dancing. My head sort of hurts.

Other notes and queries:

-I have a new skirt. It's very exciting. It's purple and has a purple lining and ruffles, and I wanted very much to wear it last night, only my parents, in helping me move out, took all my shoes. My only shoes in the world within wearing distance are my large, clompy, Caterpillar boots. Thus I am making an ironic statement of rejection of femininity, yes.

-I went to see Star Trek again! magic_doors made noises of squee, I cooed over baby Spock. shimgray notes that what the world really needs now is the Scotty 'n' McCoy Travellin' Show. I would totally watch this. They perambulate through space in a two man shuttlecraft, they drop off vaccines, they do on-the-hoof tech support, in between times they bitch. Every so often Spock sends them orders and instructive pamphlets, Chekhov sends love and drink. Tell me this isn't a great idea.

-And also! sebastienne suggested I go and see Tick Tick... Boom! at the OFS, and I am very grateful that she did, because it was wonderful. It's only an accident of time and space that I'm not more of a RENThead than I am - I mean, I have seen it on Broadway, but if seeing it involved less drastic measures than going to New York, I probably would've seen it a dozen times. I love Rent. I can see, intellectually, that it's flawed, that it can be glib and pat, and its treatment of its issues seems too simplistic in retrospect, but how can you not love it? Its energy, its passion, the way it's not about once upon a time in a kingdom far away - it has the flaws that real life has, if that makes sense. Nothing works, nothing fits together.

tick, tick... BOOM! is an earlier project of Jonathan Larson's, and it shows. It's a little less cohesive around the edges, and it's done with a kind of rough third-person narration that doesn't quite work for me, and it's a tad self-indulgent, as you might expect from a kind of meta, autobiographical piece. And yet. And yet, it's funny, it's smart and insightful, and it has the breathless energy that I love about Rent, this way it sort of hits the ground running and keeps on running. It's an hour and a half and it never lets up. I loved it. I don't know if I would have loved it so much without the framing context of Rent in my head, but even so. It was lovely.

...and now, lunch, and onwards, and onwards. The only solution to the current ungodly mess is to keep working and keep dancing and keep on trying not to cry, I think. On this note, Intrusion is tonight, deathbyshinies is DJ-ing, I am gothing up and dancing. My head will perhaps not forgive me, but the only way out is up.